My friend and I have a running joke that Jesus is always the answer. In the end we both hold to the same belief, that Jesus being the answer is the truest thing either of us could ever say.
Lately this belief has been echoing through my heart. Although I’ve noticed it seems to have a tinny kind of sound to it these days. So I stopped in the midst of the busyness of life to contemplate and mull over this belief. After hours (and seemingly days) of mulling over my past, my life, and my reality I discovered one big discrepancy. I never took the belief of Jesus being the answer to all of my hopes, dreams, fears, insecurities, and weaknesses to heart. This belief has never apparently made it past my brain.
I know that God wants my heart all of it. I realize now that I have been holding back on him. It’s created a deep set restlessness within me and I have turned everywhere to escape that feeling. All the while missing the point Jesus is the answer. It may seem simple and it is actually, but it is so hard to give up control of my heart. My heart is the one thing that is truly mine. The one thing that no can take away. For this entire year God has been asking me to give him my heart all of it; holding nothing back. I’ve dodged, dived, and ducked away from doing it, to my own pain and dissatisfaction. But I now see clearly that if i want to grow and mature from who I am now, I must relinquish control of my heart. I must in order to make my heart know that Jesus is the answer.
So here’s to letting go.